“NOW, BABY BROTHER, HOLD MY HAND WHILE WE CROSS THE STREET.”
“Thor, stop that. I’m an adult.”
“HOLD MY HAND, BROTHER.”
“I’m not your brother.”
“HOLD MY HAND.”
“Fine.
“HALT DEAR BROTHER—I HAVE BEEN INFORMED THE PROPER ACTION BEFORE CROSSING A MIDGARDIAN STREET IS TO LOOK BOTH WAYS. ALLOW ME TO DO SO FOR THE BOTH OF US.”
“Thor, every mode of transportation these pathetic humans have created would only bruise us at best—”
“THAT IS NOT THE POINT, BROTHER. AS GODS IT IS OUR RESPONSIBILITY TO SET AN EXAMPLE FOR THE YOUNGER GENERATION!”
“How many times must I remind you that such sentimental nonsense will have no sway over my decisions?”
“THINK OF THE MIDGARDIAN CHILDREN, BROTHER!”
“…”
“…”
“…THE CHILDREN!”
Was he married?
#it just really gets to me how tony will go out of his way to hide his kindness #he offers the most extravagant things like it’s nbd #”i’ll fly you to portland pfft whatevs” #he jokes that phil’s first name is ”agent” and yet #he knows about the cellist #and wants phil to have a love life #and offers to fly him wherever so he can have it #and then pretends he’s not sure when steve asks him #because god forbid anyone finds out that tony stark gives a shit



